


You're Killing My Boys, Jonathan

by Casual_Scribbles



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Archives Polycule, Georgie helped pick his tattoos, Jon had a punk phase in uni, Other, Sasha has a strong platonic bond with Martin and Jon, She calls them her boys, She definitely also held his hand while he got them, They love each other shut up, Tim and Martin want to date Jon, Tim is dating Sasha and Martin, the magnus archives is an office comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:33:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27384238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casual_Scribbles/pseuds/Casual_Scribbles
Summary: On a very hot day in the archives, Jon rolls up his sleeves to reveal tattoos. This, unfortunately, leaves Sasha as the only remaining functional assistant.
Relationships: Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist/Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Martin Blackwood/Sasha James/Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood/Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood/Tim Stoker/Sasha James/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Sasha James/Tim Stoker
Comments: 23
Kudos: 531





	You're Killing My Boys, Jonathan

“Elias still hasn’t fixed the AC?”

Sasha looks up at the rattle of iced coffee that announces Tim’s approach, decked out in the brightest Hawaiian shirt she has seen him wear so far. He’s carrying a tray of iced coffees and Sasha could kiss him for that. In fact, she will kiss him for that. She leans up and gives him a quick peck while he sets her coffee on her desk. He then moves to drop off a coffee to Martin who greets him the same way.

“Unfortunately, no,” she says, taking a sip. It’s perfect. Tim hasn’t gotten a coffee order wrong yet. “I’m starting to think he’s putting it off on purpose.”

“Weasel,” Tim grunts, flopping down into his own chair. He kicks his feet up on his desk and moves his keyboard into his lap.

Martin takes a long sip of his own coffee and looks at the remaining coffee in the tray, then to the closed door of Jon’s office, then back at Tim. “Is that coffee for Jon?”

Tim types something into his computer, no doubt nothing work-related. “Yeah, but he’s going to have to come out here and get it himself if he wants it.”

Martin shifts in his seat and scrolls slowly. Tim raises an eyebrow. “You were hoping to bring it to him weren’t you?”

Martin flushes. “I just- I don’t bring him tea because of how hot it is, and I’m worried he thinks I’m avoiding him-”

“Simp,” Tim scoffs.

Sasha rolls her eyes. “Timothy Stoker you simped for him first and don’t you dare deny it. I have the text receipts to prove it.”

Tim splutters, but they both know she’s right and so he says nothing. He simply pulls a statement toward him with a glare.

“Do your research, Timothy.”

“I _am_!”

Martin snickers.

“You too,” she turns her stern look to him and he immediately turns to his own statement.

“Yes, ma’am.”

With her boys now on task, Sasha sets to her own work. She looks up the statement giver’s name and – no surprise – finds that he used an alias. Not uncommon. With the Institute's reputation, she wouldn’t want to be associated with it, either. Unfortunately, she is. Not much she can do about that.

An alias is still something she can work with, though. She searches up the name and finds it linked to accounts on a few online discussion boards. Just a slight bit of hacking and she has the email address linked to the accounts. She shoots off an email about a follow-up statement and moves on to the next statement in her pile.

When she’s made her way through half of the pile – some successful, others dead ends – she gathers the folders and stands. The steady hum of Jon’s voice through the door stopped a few minutes ago, so she shouldn’t interrupt a statement if she heads in now. “I’m going to bring these to Jon. I’ll let him know you brought him coffee.” Martin and Tim hum an acknowledgment.

She knocks on Jon’s door and ducks inside when he calls her in. The mad bastard is wearing a longsleeved button-up, and from the sweater draped over the back of his chair he had come in with his usual cardigan. “Really, Jon? We’re on day three of an ungodly hot archive and you’re wearing _that_?”

Jon heaves a sigh. “Did you just come in here to berate me or do you actually need something.”

Sasha smiles and holds up her folders. “Just dropping these off!” She drops them on his desk and the way Jon’s shoulders droop as she does so doesn’t escape her notice. “Tim also brought you an iced coffee and you look like you need it, so,”

“I hate coffee.” Jon barely looks up at her, reaching instead for the statement pile. Sasha smacks his hand and he retreats, looking up at her with a- is he pouting? He’s pouting. Like a child.

“Then go tell him that yourself. Stop staying holed up in here. He _misses_ you.”

Jon tilts his head, looking for all the world like a confused puppy. “Why would he miss me? I’m right here.”

“Yes, but you don’t talk to him anymore. The most interaction you’ve had with him since we moved down here is assigning him more work.”

Jon doesn’t seem satisfied with that answer, but he doesn’t reach for the files again. “Fine.”

Sasha nods sharply and backs toward the door. “If you’re not out there in five minutes I’m coming back and dragging you out there myself.”

“ _Yes_ , Sasha. I understand.”

“Good.” She closes the door behind her and retakes her seat. Martin looks up from his work and glances meaningfully at Jon’s office. “Yes, Martin he’ll be right out.”

Martin nods and gets back to work. Sasha eyes the clock while she works. Jon’s cutting it a bit close, so if she finds him working on another statement she’s confiscating the pile. Thankfully, she doesn’t have to. The door creaks and he steps out of his office. Sasha looks over to greet him and does a double-take.

He’s rolled up his sleeves. This wouldn’t be out of the ordinary – in fact, she’d be quite astounded if he kept his sleeves rolled down all day while the archives were this hot – if it weren’t for the fact that his arms were covered with tattoos. They reach from his wrist up to where his sleeves cover his elbows and she’s almost certain they go up past that. The design swirls in pretty galaxy colors with black and white pictures breaking up the pattern. She sees a galaxy of stars and planets, and several gears, and on one arm there’s a spaceship between the planets. She can see why Tim and Martin are so attracted to him.

Jon walks up to Tim’s desk and gestures to the iced coffee – now melted, but still mostly coffee. “I appreciate the gesture, Tim, but unfortunately I don’t like coffee. I would be happy to pay for the next round of drinks to make up for it.”

Tim stares at Jon’s forearms. His face has gone bright red. He blinks hard and clears his throat. “Uh, yeah. Okay, boss. Uh-”

Sasha glances over at Martin who has gone equally as red. Apparently, her boys need rescuing. “That’s a great idea, Jon. Maybe you can go out with us for lunch sometime.”

Martin nods emphatically and Tim manages a strangled “mm-hmm.”

“I- yes, sure.” Jon somehow looks equally as lost as Martin and Tim, which is strange because he’s denser than a brick wall. Direct flirtations have gone right over his head, so there’s no way something as subtle as Sasha inviting him to lunch with the others would get through. “Perhaps another time. I have a lot of work to catch up on today.”

“No problem, Jon.” Sasha smiles pleasantly, and Jon returns the smile, albeit a bit awkwardly. He retreats to his office, leaving the iced coffee on Tim’s desk.

Tim and Martin watch him go, then look at each other, wide-eyed and breathless. She’s sure if she tried, she could cut through the tension in the room with a dull butter knife. They’re silent for a long moment. Then finally, finally, Martin wheezes and Tim slams his head down on his desk.

“Did you see that?” Martin hisses.

“Yes, Martin,” Sasha says

He had- there were- on his _arms_.”

“Yes, Martin.”

Tim groans, dragging his hands down his face. “ _How_ did he become more attractive? _How_.”

“I don’t know, Timothy.”

He glares at her. “You knew, didn’t you.”

“I did not.” She turns away, snickering. “Now pull yourselves together, we have work to do.”

“Yes, ma’am,” they say, but their voices still sound faint. Within a half-hour, it becomes apparent that they are not going to be getting any work done today. Martin’s pencil hasn’t moved in the last 20 minutes that he’s been staring at his paper. Tim is mindlessly scrolling, clearly not taking in any information. While Sasha has managed to get a few more files done (slower than usual, but cut her some slack – Jonathan Sims has _sleeve tattoos_ ) Tim and Martin are still on the same statements they were on when Jon walked in. She glances at the clock and decides it’s close enough to lunch to send them out.

“Alright, you two. You’re getting nothing done, so you are going out for lunch.” They look up at her with dazed expressions. She gestures to the door. “Come on. Let’s go. Come back when you’re functional.”

They nod and make an attempt at neatening their desks but ultimately give up and simply leave together. She watches them go, hand in hand, of course, then gathers their statements and adds them to her pile with a sigh. She’ll have to do their work today, too.

When Jon comes out of his office later, a few statements in hand, and asks where Tim and Martin are, she glares at him over her pile of statements. “You’re killing my boys, Jonathan. You’re killing them.”


End file.
